Returning to Work After Giving Birth
Tough Feelings in a Tough Economy
Jan 4, 2009 Kathy Schlossmacher
It is not easy to leave a newborn when it is time to return to work. Unfortunately our economic times require two incomes to maintain a sustainable existence. At the same time Moms still suffer as they walk out the door to work when they would rather be home mothering.
The first thing to do is to recognize those feelings. Telling oneself that the feelings aren't there will only make them worse. Recognize the feelings for what they are. They are an honest assessment of what a mom feels leaving a baby.
Trust in the fact that the leg work has been done. Quality daycare is in place, emergency contacts have been established. Remember that all has been settled upon and worked out. As a mom you have done everything possible to ensure the wellbeing of your baby. It is possible to find some comfort in that.
Benefits of Childcare
There are many myths associated with the downside of childcare, but there are also recent studies that show that children often benefit in childcare. Children in childcare often learn to talk earlier, are better socially with other children and often show signs of enjoying the activities that go with day care. Console yourself that your child may enjoy the experience and the exposure to other adults.
Adults also benefit from childcare in that everyone needs a respite from a baby. Taking care of a baby is hard work and sometimes that work is monotonous and dull. An adult who goes to a job everyday enjoys the stimulations of adult company and assignment and this can help the adult feel less lonely in the childrearing department.
Plan weekends that are really baby friendly. Take your child out and share good times. Visit libraries, museums and other age appropriate activities to continue the bond that has been forged in the first six weeks. Plan evenings that include the baby. Read stories, get down on the floor and play and enjoy the uninterrupted time you do have with your child. Worry less about housekeeping and other adult concerns and focus on baby when baby is up.
Keep in detailed contact with the day care provider. He or she can tell a parent anything new the baby did or deliver funny anecdotes about how the baby is adjusting. Listen and appreciate these stories because some day your child will want to hear them.
Most of all remember that the separation anxiety if often worse for the adult than for the child. Be kind to yourself as you both begin this new adventure.
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