Pregnancy & Childbirth

» jane79 - loss of a child

on wednesday i noticed i had dark brown on thr toilet tissue. At this point i was 11 weeks and five days pregnant. I took myself to the maternity hospital, my blood pressure was high my pulse was racing and i had a high temperature. They decided to send me through to see the doctor who undertook and internal. The doctor told me she wasn't going to send me for a scan because my 12 week scan was booked for friday.
Needless to say thursday morning i had a tiny amount of bleeding with some small clots. Once again i took myself the hospital, this time i was treated with compassion. They immediately took me through for a scan. Before the sonographer told me i knew she wouldn't find a heart beat and she didn't. They have booked me in for anoher scan next wek just to make sure. I have still got slight bleeding and no stomach pains, so i still have a wave of hope esecially because i'm still suffring from morning sickness, sore brasts. But in my heart of heart i am trying to prepare myself for that emty feeling. Typical you go throuh the feelings of is it something i've done of haven't done but there are no answers. This is my second loss within the space of 5 months. I am dreading trying again because i am terrified if i have to go through this again bacaus i don't think i can.

-- posted by jane79